One trend is anal sex. A 2017 SKYN Condoms Millennial Sex Survey found that 36 percent of women and 15 percent of men have anal sex regularly. And this isn’t a new statistic. The Journal of Sexual Medicine reported in 2010 that 40 percent of women aged 20 to 24 had tried anal sex.
While these figures may be higher than past results, anal sex is often only joked about since it has a stigma. And those who do enjoy it rarely speak out about its merits. It has also gained popularity because it eliminates the risk of pregnancy.
A lot of people weren’t happy when writer Gigi Engle told Teen Vogue readers that, “People have been having anal sex since the dawn of humanity.”
But it’s true. She also explained the reason for her belief and why it is a subject that everyone needs to learn about.
“It’s important that we talk about all kinds of sex because not everyone is having — or wants to have — vaginal sex,” Engle said.
Many shy away from anal sex for a variety of reasons — it’s dirty, sodomy is wrong, it hurts, only “bad” people do it. Those who believe it is immoral often exaggerate the defense that having anal sex increases the risk of acquiring HIV.
“By that logic, women should never engage in vaginal sex because of the risks of being infected with HPV, which is far more easily transmittable than HIV,” said Huffington Post writer Michelangelo Signorile.
Different types of sex aren’t normally discussed or promoted. But when Harvard holds its annual Sex Week, a week of promoting and understanding sex and sexuality, presenters incorporate an anal sex workshop, the most recent called “What What in the Butt: Anal Sex 101.”
“Oftentimes campus dialogue doesn’t include important aspects of sex, sexuality and sexual health, gender and gender identity, and relationships and intimacy,” Lita Peña, co-president of Sexual Health Education and Advocacy Throughout Harvard, told the Crimson, Harvard’s student newspaper. “These are really complicated conversations and we should be having them more often.”
While anal sex is only being talked about behind closed doors, an even more unheard of trend is that of the threesome. While it can be the combination of different genders, the trend currently is between a female and two males.
A 2016 Archives of Sexual Behavior survey reported that 82 percent of men and 31 percent of women were interested in having a threesome.
“Younger guys engaging in threesomes are shifting along with society toward being less homophobic,” said Ryan Scoats, a research assistant at Birmingham City University in England. “This is allowing them to have threesomes with other men without it challenging their sexuality.”
He learned that men are more open to the idea than women, but are also more likely to be disappointed by the experience.
Guys usually have threesomes in order to say they had one while women have them to explore their sexuality.
Most women do not participate in threesomes for several reasons. Porn presents it as something brutal and objectifying, but women’s magazines are quick to point out that it is an inaccurate portrayal. In a Cosmo May 2017 article, women shared what it was like to have a threesome and talked about the pros and cons.
“The most exciting part of the threesome was watching another woman get on top of my boyfriend and ride him until she had an orgasm,” one respondent said.
Other respondents found the psychological impact of the threesome to be as thrilling as the physical ones.
“The danger of someone in our college finding out we’d all hooked up and being shocked by that, that was kind of thrilling,” another respondent said. “And it was fun for my friend and I to feel like we were seducing this hot guy together.”
Whether you decide to engage in either act is up to you. But at least learn about them before you make a decision. Don’t rely on society’s outdated views and porn’s over-the-top embellishment to turn you off.